Blog 4 "What can a woman do to reduce her risk of assault"

            From a very young age, we hear the same questions over and over again from our parents. Where are you going? Who are you going with? What time are coming home? As adults, the same questions should still apply to women. Every time I go out with my friends or to a job interview, I always make sure that either my husband or one of my family members knows the details.

            My first year in college, I had evening classes. I had days where my classes ended at 10 o’clock at night and I would be walking to my car all alone. Most women believe that they are safe since they are on college campus, but there a lot of women assaulted on college campuses than bars. To protect myself, I took self-defense classes which are very helpful to women of any age. The class taught me to be more aware of my environment, to walk to my car with keys between my fingers, to talk on the cell phone loudly to scare anyone away, and using a buddy system at any hour of the day as often as possible.

            That is why sometimes I am not surprised when women do get hurt. I see plenty of women jogging at night all alone with their headphones on or even some women walking from the bars alone. I am very addicted to Law & Order: Special Victims Unit. This show is about sexual offences such as rape and pedophilia. This show really made me aware of how many men out there ready to rape. The show does also teach how to be more aware of such men.

            Women can protect themselves by starting from simple as taking a self-defense classes and buying either a taser gun or a paper spray. Most of all, women need to become more aware of their environment. They need to have a buddy system with their friends and to make sure to let someone know where they are going and what time they are planning to return. Safety should always be a priority for women at any hour of the day.

 

Blog 3 Women's Body Image

 

Have you ever known someone with a mental illness? How did/does the illness impact his/her life? What have you learned about this mental illness just from knowing them?

I have been a nanny for almost 10 years. I have seen variety of parenting skills which I agree with and those that I do not. Almost a year ago, I was a nanny to four children, two boys and two girls. Their ages were two, seven, nine and twelve. Their mother was a very thin woman. She was about five foot seven and couldn’t have weighted more than 110lbs with size about two. Their mother did emphasize on healthy eating and weight control. She only wanted the children to eat organic fruits and vegetables with no sugar snacks. Her children, however, expressed to me that their mother would feed them fast food often. Those actions revealed to me an outward appearance to others rather than actually fallow through with her ideas. I believe she was only concerned with her own body image and not her children.  In this woman’s life, food was a control factor rather than a good habit to teach her children.

  One of the girls was age seven and the other was few months away from turning twelve years old. The seven years old took the genes of her mother with very slim body type. The twelve years old on the other hand, had a much thicker body type. According to body type, weight, height and age, neither of the girls was overweight or "fat." Once again, the two girls emphasized different concern of their body image. The mother and her twelve years old daughter don’t have any sort of relationship established. The matter in effect, they pretty much disliked one another. As a mother, an adult authority and role model, she should encourage self-satisfactions and self-image in her young daughters. Except, this mother did just the opposite by calling out her daughters imperfections to her ideals.

The twelve years old, was a very active in sports and especially in the summer camps.  I brought up a question to this young girl about her insistence of wearing pants to her sports activities? Her answer was shocking because she told me that her mother said that her legs are fat. Why? Why? Would you tell your child such harsh statement? Even if the child argues with their parent, their parent is still someone they look to as a role model. This twelve years old is five foot four and weighted only 67lbs.

 Now, the seven years old was very tiny. She was about five foot and weighted 47lbs. According to her though, after any meal she would say that she is “fat” because her little belly would naturally peeked out a little from food intake. 

Both instances indicate the importance of family influence on the way a woman feels about food and her body.  These two girls are example of the importance one’s family has on their lives.  Healthy body image should be a daily encouragement in young’s woman life.

Blog 2.. "The Talk"

Remembering myself as a teen, it was tuff. I remember my mom mentioning few things and suggestions but she never really had “the talk” directly with me. I really wish I had more knowledge and guidance throughout my teen years. Once I have children, I will definitely guide them with knowledge and support that will encourage them to make better decisions. Here is my scenario that I came up with after talking to moms who have teenagers.

            I believe parent should have “the talk” with their child in the comfort of their home. That will create a comfortable environment for a child without the awkwardness or embarrassment of being out with their parent in public. Home is just more suited choice to both the parent and the child where the atmosphere is not pressuring.

Parent: (Name of a child/nickname) do you have a minute to talk? We can do it over a snack on the coach?

Child (may say the fallowing): Can we talk later/ not right now/ okay but just few minutes  

Try being encouraging when you approach your child the first time with “the talk.” A good time to talk with your child is when you start to notice their interests in the opposite sex, the sooner the better. Once you see them blush in front of the opposite sex, that’s one of the clues that your child is ready for the correct guidance.

Parent: I noticed that you have an interest in that boy/girl the other day? Do you like him/her? Don’t be shy. You can tell me anything. Mom/Dad loves you very much and there is nothing you can’t tell me.

Child may answer the following: Yes/I don’t want to talk about this/ might get shy and embarrassed/ might take an interest in the conversation/ yes can you help me to talk to them or how do I approach them

 Don’t be afraid to talk to them because they’re your children. If you don’t educate them the other children will and probably already have. If you act nervous, uncomfortable, silly or shifty, the kid will pick up on that and you will lose most of your influence.

Parent: yes my love I will help you. Let me mention few insights that you might already know and this might be uncomfortable but I am here for you and nothing is more import then your safety. I can’t make choices for you but I can encourage you to make smart choices. Now, no mom/dad me but just trust me that I have been your age once and I understand what you are going through. It’s natural to feel feeling for someone. Those feelings might spark an interest of exploring and even lead to sex.  

Child might interrupt: But mom/dad I really don’t want to talk about this/ mom/dad I already know this.

Be upfront and practical. No beating around the bush and doing cutesy stories. Tell your child that you will listen to all their questions without being judgmental, jumping to conclusions, or laughing at them. You want to create an open line of communication. This is important and if you don’t then someone else will. Tell them that no question is foolish and let them know if you don’t know the answer you will look it up and find out.

Parent: I know son/daughter that you might already know. I am not challenging your knowledge. I just want to stay connected in your choices and that you will trust me enough to share whenever you are in trouble. I want to be certain that you know that I am also your friend and that you can trust me. I want to make sure that you are being safe when you decide to start having sex. I am not against your choice if you want to start to have sex. I just want you to trust me and ask important questions about sex.

Child: okay mom/dad. Do you promise if I ask you few questions you won’t laugh at me?

Parent: yes of course. There is not a single question that isn’t important.

Child: how do you know that you are ready to have sex? Like when is the right time.

Parent: The best time is when you get married. But if you think you are ready sooner just let me know.  You will know once you are in love with someone and you feel an emotional connection. Then you can decide if that is the right time for you.  Don’t ever feel like you are pressured to do anything when you are not ready. Please talk to me when you feel pressured.

Child (older teenager): I am thinking about having sex and I wanted to talk with you about that decision. What do you think about me having sex for the first time?  

Parent (supportive): I feel if you say that you are ready then you are. I can’t stop you. I want to support you on your decision. I do want to make sure you are using proper birth control method. Do you know about birth control methods? 

 

Child can go either way: I do/ I don’t. Can you help me/ I have already spoken to my friends but can you clarify that for me please. 

 

Parent: it’s important that you are aware that are lots of different STD’s out there and it’s important to use a condom for protection against those diseases and chances of getting pregnant/getting someone pregnant.  

 Show them how to Google for answers to questions. One of good examples is WebMD.  Also, pick up information from your doctor’s office on STD’s and teen pregnancy. Doctors have a lot of resources. There are over thousands STD’s out there and most do not have symptoms that show up for years. Recommend them to read few books such as:;;kfkdfrm

• Boundaries In Dating by Cloud and Townsend
• Teen Love on Relationships by Kimberly Kirberger

 Your child might have few questions for you. So try to approach them with an open mind. Answering questions such:

•  How painful is sex the first time?
• How do you know when you're really ready for sex?
•  I am thinking about having sex and I wanted to talk with you about that decision. What do you think about me having sex for the first time? Or I am thinking about having sex and I wanted to talk about birth control, including condoms.

The above was a simple scenario that can go just as smooth or it can be a little tenser but it’s all how you approach the subject. Every teenager is different so is the parent. Approach your child with love and understanding that you were once a teenager yourself and that is time to put back those shoes once again. Brooke23

Blog1 -What health issues are you most concerned about?

As women we have number of issues to worry about. Few things that pop into my head are breast health, ovary health, and uterus health. Other major issues include cholesterol, osteoporosis, blood pressure, obesity and diabetes. I personally am more concerned with ovary health, uterus health, osteoporosis and obesity.

Ovary and uterus health seem to interlink with each other in the sense that all is in one place and can spread either direction. For example, if HPV is not caught in time it can turn into cervical cancer, and ovarian cancer in many ways effects uterus. After having several issues with uterus at young age along with ovarian cyst, I was encouraged to get educated about my own body. Women’s health is important because if we are not educated then how we to prevent issues that can indeed help save a life.

My other concern as a woman is obesity and osteoporosis. Naturally women care a higher percentage of body fat because we are the once who get pregnant. Its body’s natural way to keep the baby inside protected. We also gain extra pounds during pregnancy to insure baby has sufficient amount of fluids and thermal balance. Don’t quote me because this is all from my general knowledge and not deeply researched. Few extra stored up fat is okay but excess fat on the other hand can lead to many numbers of issues. It is understandable that women have lesser number of lean body mass and it takes longer to lose that baby fat or just few extra pounds from the holidays. That is why it creates a greater attention not just in women but obesity in general. The obesity rates are growing daily. But since women are more likely to suffer from osteoporosis, we should be concerned with weight issues. When you are overweight, it creates greater pressure and stress on your bones. Along with overweight, number of other issues occur such as blood pressure and diabetes which then allows even low ability to stay healthy and keep up the immune system.

I spoke to three women about some of these concerns that I have and I wanted to see if their concerns were the same or if they had few extras since they are different in age. My friend Claudia is 32 years old who works full time and has two young kids. Her concern was obesity. Her Hispanic back ground doesn’t offer healthy choices. She told me that it’s harder to cook everyday with full time job. She was not only concerned for her weight but also her children since on the run they end up eating easy junk food. She felt like fast food restaurants should have more healthy options. I agreed with her because I am part time student and I work full time. It might not seem a lot but all of that is time consuming and without planning meals weekly, weight can accumulate. My husband’s grandmother who is 71 years old had little bit different issue. She was more concerned with cholesterol. She told me it affects her heart, arteries, and even her oxygen. She is on different medications to help her lower it. My friend Christina is 24 and is pregnant with her second child.  She is concerned about diet related illness like diabetes and high blood pressure. To my surprise, their concerns were similar. At different ages and stages of women’s lives, the concerns vary but they are still similar in nature.

Quick Mini Bio

Hi Everyone,

My name is Anastasiya Koroleva (aka Wells). I am recently married, just under 6 month, and haven't gotten the chance to change my last name yet (it’s a complicated process). This is my first time ever blogging. Never in my life read a blog or written one. I do love to write on my facebook page and I actually thought of starting a blog before, just never got to it. I assume this is where my blogging career begins, ready, set, go. I know for sure it’s hard to summarize my life into just few paragraph but I am going to try.

My major is Dietetics. The reason I chose to go into this field is because my husband is type one Diabetic and I have always been health conscious. I grew up part of my life in Russia, my birth place, eating fresh from the garden. Then here in America most food is processed which makes me want to educated families and their children to make better health choices when it comes to food. I want to work in the field with children in order to establish a lifelong goal of nutrition. Many kids in today's generation are not educated by their families on proper eating which then leads into obesity, heart disease, diabetes and so on. In order to be successful in life long nutrition, one needs to learn from the beginning. This is my plan in health, to prevent different diseases and cancers. One of my hobbies of course is obsession with cooking. I can cook all day long. I also love going thrift shopping with my husband and just being with him in his company. I am in this class I would say by a mistake of misunderstanding, but I don’t believe in mistakes. I believe there is a purpose for everything including me being in this class. I really hope to share some of my struggles as woman and to share my testimony of overcoming them. I can't wait to learn more about women's health and apply it to my own life as well. I am sure there are still a lot of things as a woman I yet to learn about my own body.

Here my unique testimony. As I mentioned earlier I am recently married, and oh boy it’s been one amazing journey so far. I came from a broken home with no father and seen my mother struggle relationship to relationship while working 2 to 3 jobs a time trying to raise my brother and I. All that occurred in Russia where I was born. Then my mother met my step-dad online and that is how we all ended up here in America. All my mother's struggles reflected on me. Once I started dating, I bounced relationship to relationship. I was determined that no man will ever hurt me because I will always out run them by beating them to that first step. I was determined to never get married because marriage to me was nothing but pain, struggle and that love was only in movies that could never be true. I never realized how broken I really was and how blinded I was with my own desires. The night when I meat, now my husband, was a true movie where the world paused so that he and I could collide. The works not of our own but all predestined by the Lord's calling. I was faithless and ungodly woman who called herself feminist where no man can tell me what to do. I now laugh at that idea. I was blessed with a Godly man only 6 month of dating,  we were engaged, and married at 9 month. We as women believe so many lies of this world while the truth says "Trust in the Lord with all thine hearts; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, he shall direct thy path." Proverbs 3:5-6.

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